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I had the distinct pleasure of going Christmas shopping with my daughter last weekend. When I interact with retail salespeople I always come away with a sales training story to tell; this shopping spree was no exception.

Let me begin by saying that I am all about being confident and taking charge with customers and prospects whether you are in retail or business to business sales. Customers want you to take control and assist them; that’s why we have salespeople in the first place. Sometimes I think we forget that. But there is a limit.

My daughter and I were considering a purchase at a department store that is known for their outstanding customer service. Surprisingly, the salesperson that was helping us could not have been more annoying if she had been coached to do so. Included in her many sins was that she was inappropriately aggressive. In spite of her, we bought something. Sadly, I’m afraid that our purchase will only serve to reinforce her less than stellar sales techniques (this is known as the “Benevolent Dolphin” effect which I will cover in another post). We went on to another well known department store and ran into another pugnacious salesperson. Her aggressiveness made me think that if I found myself in a street fight, I would want her on my side; victory would be certain.

I used to have a sales manager that told me, “Scott, don’t push on customers; just lean on them.” What great sales advice that was. We need to be assertive with customers but never aggressive like the two salespeople mentioned above. Assertive means confident and self assured. Would you trust your doctor if he or she weren’t confident and self assured? Your customers won’t trust you either if you aren’t confident and self assured and they will be less likely to buy from you.

Being aggressive with customers is normally counterproductive. Do you respond favorably to people that treat you in an offensive, arm twisting or forceful way? When a customer perceives that a salesperson is trying to force the sale, a bounty of objections will soon follow. They will try to stop the selling process in its tracks by using objections. How do you ensure that you’re not being aggressive (versus assertive) with prospects and customers? Talk to an experienced salesperson that you trust who has observed you on numerous sales calls. Allow them to give you some honest feedback. It might be that you have the opposite problem, being too meek; either way, the feedback will be good.

Every prospect or customer has a different threshold for when they believe a salesperson is becoming aggressive and therefore offensive. We have to adjust our assertiveness for every person we contact. Controlled assertiveness is a necessary ingredient to be successful in sales. Aggressiveness is never well received.

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Tags: aggressive

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